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I'm Fine, I'm Happy Now


After a long battle with emphysema, my mom died a few hours after Christmas Day 2002. Her doctor had told Dad a year before that she wouldn't make it to Christmas, but there in the hospital she fought hard, and as if to show the doctor he was wrong, she waited until 2:20 AM on the 26th to take her last breath. That was a sad Christmas, keeping vigil at Mom's bedside as she lay comatose, her breathing labored. Especially for my dad who had been married to her for 45 years. Their life together had been a wonderful one. She was the center of his life and was his joy, and he would be lost without her.

In the weeks and months following her death, even though my sisters and I spent time with Dad, there was a huge void in his life I knew we could never fill. His grief was painful to watch.

About three months later, my dad had an experience which I believe helped begin his healing. One day he was sitting on his bed, crying and talking to Mom as he usually did every day, when he heard my mom say to him, "Bob, I'm fine." He wasn't sure if it was his imagination or not, but her voice sounded very clear and strong as though she were sitting there in the room right next to him.

When Dad told me this, I said immediately that I believed it had been Mom and not his imagination. I said Mom wanted him to know she is fine, that she knows he's sad but wants him to continue on and live a happy life. My dad seemed to be comforted by my words, and I felt my belief confirmed that there is life after death. I truly believe this and believe that such great love as my parents felt for one another can never die. My mom is in Heaven and some day my dad, and all of us who love her, will be with her again.

Jeff McKay




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